


Betsy

by flippyspoon



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, BILLY HAS A DOG, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, PTSD, Post-Season/Series 03, Pre-Slash, Therapy Animal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-30 01:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19842718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flippyspoon/pseuds/flippyspoon
Summary: Billy, Steve, and Betsy the therapy St. Bernard.





	Betsy

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote a story about Betsy! Might write more- I know I talked about a couple ideas that aren't in here so maybe it can be a little mini-series about Billy and his dog who knows.

The dog’s name was Betsy. She’d already been named by the time Max and Susan gave her to Billy. She’d been abandoned and mistreated according to the people at the pound. She was only a year-old.

She only had one eye.

Billy was in bed when Max appeared in his door, interrupting his quiet but abjectly lonely darkness that he didn’t know how to get out of.

“Hey, Billy?” She said gently. “We have something for you? Can you get up?”

Billy had rubbed his eyes and climbed out of bed because he was used to following Neil’s orders most of the time even when he’d dared to talk back. Neil was gone now but the reflex remained.

“Coming,” he murmured. 

Max waited there as he forced himself to his feet. She was bouncing on her toes.

“Do you remember how I said that Lucas’s uncle was in Vietnam? And he got a puppy and it helped him a lot with his shell shock?”

“Um...I guess.” He was only wearing a tank top with his pajama pants, the scars all up and down his arms on display and some of the very ugly ones across his chest and back. He felt that all-encompassing shame even in the dark as Max stood there. He grabbed his black hooded sweatshirt from his hamper and slipped it on, zipping it up before following Max out to the living room in his socks.

“So my mom and I thought...maybe a dog could help you too.” She sounded so nervous. It made her voice sound strange. She never sounded like that, especially with him. 

He wasn’t quite following the conversation but when they reached the living room and he saw the gigantic St. Bernard sitting primly on the floor in front of the couch and panting up at him like she’d been waiting for him specifically to arrive, he understood.

“So...we took a shot,” Susan said. “Listen, Billy. We can help you take care of her whenever you need it. And if it gets to be too much we’ll take care of her full time. Max loves her. But she’s for you. Just...maybe see how it goes?”

Billy didn’t say so, but he didn’t need to see how it would go as he looked down at the one big sad eye of Betsy the St. Bernard who already had a thick blue collar and a tag with her name on it.

He was in love.

He swallowed and squatted down and looked into Betsy’s eyes and she bobbed her head and licked his chin and he found himself smiling which was its own little miracle. It wasn’t that he _never_ smiled but it took a lot more than a dog licking his face these days.

“Hey, Betsy,” he said. 

He often had nightmares that he could kill people just by touching them, that the shadow still had him and he was killing Eleven and Max and the others and even now he only tentatively raised his hands to pet Betsy, as if he might harm her in the attempt. But Betsy stood now and stepped forward into his arms as if she belonged there and he found himself swallowing a lump in his throat. Her fur was so soft and she was so perfect for hugging and he found himself burying his buzzed head in her fur, even chuckling when she licked his neck.

“I think he likes her,” Susan said to Max.

When he looked up, Max was grinning at him and that made him feel okay too. He felt like he kept making Max cry, except now it was for completely different reasons than when he’d used to make her cry.

Then he said something he rarely ever said. “Thanks.”

It took him a little while to get used to the responsibilities of a dog but it also gave him something to focus on that he actually liked. He had not been back very long. There were still times when somebody merely speaking behind him set him off. Dr. Owens had told him it would be a while before he was functional enough for something like a job, and he had to go in and talk to doctors and a psychiatrist at an unmarked building outside Hawkins every week and sometimes multiple times in a week.

But now he had the makings of a routine and it got him out of the house.

In the mornings, he took Betsy out for a walk. He put out her food and she’d eat her kibble while he ate breakfast and then they’d play in the yard a bit. 

It was something anyway. The beginnings of something. 

Sometimes Billy felt as if Betsy knew everything about him. She seemed to know what he needed at any given time. When he didn’t want to get out of bed, sometimes she jumped up and rested her head on him and the bit of affection put him in a mood just good enough to get him out of his room. Other times, she knew he needed more of a nudge and she pulled on his shirt with her teeth.

It was Max who kept suggesting he go into town. He’d been intending too. He didn’t _like_ being a weird hermit or feeling like an invalid. It didn’t make him feel _better_ and every doctor had been prodding him to get out more. He hated being alone now but he also had an intense fear of being with too many other people and it made him freeze up. He felt as if everyone _knew_ and that everyone thought he was still a monster. He was most afraid that he actually was still a monster. Sometimes he thought he could hear the shadow in his head and it took him hours to calm down again. 

Yet the first time he went into town, nobody was looking at him. 

Everyone was looking at Betsy. They weren’t looking at him at all which, unlike the last several years of his life, was just what he wanted.

“Okay, girl,” Billy muttered, as Betsy tugged on the leash.

It was a Friday and that meant they were going to Family Video. Betsy always got excited when they went to Family Video twice a week. The Camaro was still totaled and he wasn’t completely sure he could have driven it anyway yet. He hadn’t been able to admit that to anyone. Instead, he just put off Susan when she said they could figure out how to get it fixed anytime. For the time being, it sat parked in the Mayfield garage with a tarp over it and Billy never went in to look at the thing. 

So instead they walked all over town and he didn’t hate it, the walking. It was kind of nice.

It was nice now as they crossed the parking lot and Betsy tugged him along like she was just dying to rent a romantic comedy or something.

Sometimes Billy thought Betsy somehow knew how much he liked seeing Steve Harrington there at the video store, bright-eyed and beautiful and friendly but never overbearing when Billy visited to return his rentals and browse for new ones.

But that couldn’t have been true… Besty had good instincts, but she was still a dog.

“Hey, Bets!” Steve said, immediately squatting down to talk to Betsy. 

Since he’d been back, every person he knew who wanted to talk to him would come up close and ask him how he was and he hated it so much he could hardly get a word out. He much preferred the passersby who only smiled down at his dog and paid him no mind, or Harrington here who immediately threw all his attention at Betsy and not him, at least at first until he could ease himself into things. “How’re you doin’, girl? Yeah?” Steve laughed as Betsy licked his face and for some reason that made Billy blush.

Sometimes he felt as if Betsy was some extension of himself. She could be excited and affectionate with Harrington because Billy couldn’t bear to. Could never, not after what he’d done to Steve even before he’d been a monster, and certainly not after what he’d become.

“Hey, so I had a question?” Steve said, finally getting to his feet. Billy was busying himself looking at the New Releases but now Steve was looking right at him and his battered heart started racing. 

“Yeah?” Billy said.

“Yeah, so I was wondering if you wanted to come over, watch some flicks at my place?” Steve said, shrugging. “Robin’s coming to. Tomorrow night. It’s no big deal. And Betsy can come.”

This sounded like some plot put together by Max who was always worried that he was isolating himself too much. 

But maybe he had gotten a _little_ better, because he found himself desperately wanting to go to Steve’s house, especially if Robin was going to be there too. Just Steve, he didn’t think he could handle for too long with all the feelings roiling inside him and all the history between them. But Robin seemed cool to him. They’d only been dimly aware of each other in school and she seemed to hold nothing against him. She was easy to be around.

“Um...alright?” Billy scratched his head and nodded, his gaze flitting about the room. “Sure.”

“Great!” Steve beamed and Billy saw him exchange a little look with Robin across the room that he couldn’t read but she threw him a thumbs up.

“We’re watching Bergman, right!” Robin said.

“Oh, that sounds like a lot of fun,” Billy said with a snort. It was a close as he had gotten to a joke in a while. 

Steve was looking at him like the sun was shining through his eyes. “I don’t know what you guys are talking about but we’re definitely watching _Stripes_.”

“That’s fine,” Billy said, shrugging.

The next thirty-six hours Billy spent bouncing between anticipation and dread. He wanted to go so badly but he also really didn’t. Yet he made the mistake of telling Max about it so at five o’clock on Saturday, he found himself walking Betsy to Loch Nora at her urging. 

He didn’t look great. In fact, he hated how he looked. It was as presentable as he got these days, by his own standards. He was wearing an old red t-shirt that was his favorite just because it was soft and his black hoodie that he was seldom seen without now. His jeans were baggier than they’d ever been because he was so much thinner. He sighed and felt the soft bristle of his buzzed hair as Betsy pulled him down the street to Steve Harrington’s house. It would be a long time before he had long hair again, although he was getting used to reaching up and touching that soft little bristle. It did feel nice on his fingers. It wasn’t unlike petting Betsy.

When he got to Steve Harrington’s, he was already standing in front of the house by the time he noticed the extra couple of cars he hadn’t expected in the driveway and on the street. A terrible panic closed up his throat and he yanked back on Betsy’s leash but it was too late as she pulled him onward and the front door opened. Steve came out, looking bothered, shutting the door behind him.

Steve checked his watch. “Hey!” He smiled but it was a nervous smile and it was making Billy yet more nervous. “Hi. You’re um...early, uh-”

“Oh.” Billy grimaced. He hadn’t noticed. But of course, he wasn’t _really_ wanted. His thoughts started to spiral but Steve gently touched his arm.

“Billy, it’s not like a problem? It’s just…” He rolled his eyes. “Nancy and Jonathan stopped by? And my parents haven’t left yet? I just didn’t expect them all around.”

_Fuck_.

Four extra people, one of whom had been shooting at him before Steve had plowed into his car. Steve, he’d made his peace with as far as that went. But Nancy Wheeler? For all he knew, she still thought he was a total psycho. The panic was coming in hot and Betsy was whining, nuzzling his leg like she knew. 

“Oh,” Billy said. “Um… I...I…”

“Hey,” Steve said, still with that careful touch on his arm, squeezing him just enough to know he was there. “You could come around back? You can wait there. I’ll get rid of em’ in a minute. Don’t worry. You can smoke back there too.”

“Yeah, alright.” His face burned with shame but he followed Harrington around the house, feeling like a completely pathetic loser, so utterly unable to handle basic social interactions that he had to hide out until the scary people were gone.

“Everyone’s in the living room so you should be fine here,” Steve said, nodding at a deck chair. He sat down and Betsy rested her head on his knee. He felt marginally better stroking her fur. “I’ll be back in a few minutes, okay? Do you need anything?”

“No.” He wished Steve would just go away. He had a desperate desire to walk all the way home again as soon as Steve was gone except that...he had been looking forward to spending some time with Steve. He’d daydreamed about it all day. 

Steve nodded and as soon as he was gone, Billy bent his head and his eyes leaked tears as he nuzzled Betsy who worriedly licked at him and pawed at his leg. 

It seemed like much more than a few minutes but Billy fought his way through it and did not walk home. If Betsy hadn’t been there, he certainly would have. He finally took off his shoes and rolled up his jeans and sat at the edge of the pool to dunk his feet as he smoked and patted Betsy’s head when she sat down next to him.

“What am I doing here?” He whispered, rubbing his eyes. Betsy whined and nuzzled him. 

He couldn’t stop the tears that slid down his cheeks and he sniffed and wiped them away, taking long drags. His eyes would be red when Steve found him. Doubly humiliating.

“Hey, man.” Steve’s soft voice sounded behind him and Billy sat up straight and sniffed. He was going to move but Steve said, “It’s cool. Let’s sit here a minute.” 

Steve sat down next to Billy. He was barefoot too and he dunked his feet in the water, splashing Billy’s legs a little. Betsy got up and came around to lick at him and he laughed and scratched under her chin and kissed her big, floppy ears. He had two Cokes under his arm and he set them down and handed one to Billy.

“Everybody’s gone now,” Steve said. “Except Robin. But we can sit out here a minute. Robin’s good anyway. She’s got pizza and _Blade Runner._ ”

It was obviously clear to Steve that Billy couldn’t go in yet and that Steve was being so observant meant that Billy’s state of near terror was incredibly obvious and it made him want to crawl into a hole.

He was still panicking, even now. His hands shook as he popped the tab on his Coke and he pretended he wasn’t still crying. He thought Steve was some kind of saint for not saying anything about it.

They were quiet, sipping their pop and petting the dog; the only thing keeping Billy together even a little bit.

“I don’t know why you’d want to hang out with me,” Billy said suddenly. “Did Max make you?”

“No,” Steve said, his gaze trained on Billy, who couldn’t bear to look back. “I just wanted to hang out.”

“Because I’m the life of the fucking party, huh?” Billy said. He frowned at his can of Coke and flipped the tab back and forth until it broke off and fell into the pool.

He heard Steve take a deep breath and sit thinking for a bit and then he said, “I know...you’re in this dark place? I know you think you’re this scary monster and I know that you’re pretty messed up by what happened to you and...you think that’s all you are. But when you come by to the store and talk to me? You do actually talk. I don’t think you realize it. You start chatting after a minute. You get distracted petting Betsy and you can talk and it’s nice? And you talk to Robin about movies… I like talking to you. It’s...it’s my favorite part of… I like _you_.” Billy swallowed and looked up at Steve, his vision blurred by tears. “I like you,” Steve said softly. 

“But...I’m…” Billy shook his head. His thoughts were swimming. It was a shocking bit of information. He’d loved Steve Harrington from the jump. It had never been an option. It still didn’t seem like one. “I’m a wreck, man,” Billy murmured.

“Yeah.” Steve nodded. “I know.”

“I...I like you too?” Billy said. “I…really really like you.”

Steve was smiling at him. Mr. Sunshine. Billy had to remind himself to breathe when Steve smiled liked that. 

He hated to dim that sun but he couldn’t lie either.

“Harrington,” Billy said. “I can’t… I like you but I can’t do...all that like dating or...I-I can’t, I’m still…”

“Billy.” Steve took Billy’s hand in both of his. He still had that sunshine smile. It was practically blinding but now he looked down at their fingers tangled together. For a second, Steve seemed like the nervous one. “I can be pretty dense? But I’m not that dense. Of course, you can’t do this right now. I get it, man. I can wait. Doesn’t mean I won’t be here for you.”

“You can...wait?” Billy said.

Betsy sat next to Steve on her hind paws and look at Billy with her usual guileless cheer through that one big dark doggy eye. She panted and leaned into Steve who threw an arm around her and nodded at Billy. “I can wait,” Steve said. “What have I got to do?”

Billy absorbed that bit of mind-altering information and nodded and looked down at their feet in the bright blue of the pool and Betsy stuck herself in between them, clearly begging for pets that they happily gave her and Billy was suddenly so grateful for the St. Bernard, he didn’t know how he would ever make it up to Max for having the idea.

“Can we sit out here a bit longer?” Billy said. 

“Sure, man.” Steve nodded and took another sip of Coke. “I got all the time in the world.”


End file.
